Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
