talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
