So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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