I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
