My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
