oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
