I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
