not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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