Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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