I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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