I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
