idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Randomize
