So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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