alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just high enough for therapy.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I am mentally ready for anal.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
