I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
