I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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