Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry nborvan hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes

Fav 6 2099 1146
share tweet
(636): View more from Missouri

there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter

Fav 3 2736 1266
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.

Fav 35 3405 1912
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.

Fav 2 1444 1005
share tweet
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks

(1403): View more from

That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills

Fav 2 1616 874
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.

Fav 2 1323 756
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.

Fav 6 1645 964
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(218): View more from Minnesota

Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.

Fav 0 306 154
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(330): View more from Ohio

AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN

(1-330): View more from Ohio

Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???

Fav 0 171 35
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT