Duck Duck Cougar?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
