So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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