Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
