How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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