I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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