I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
BRING THE BAGELS
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
