I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
