I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
