how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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