just come out here and I will go home with you...
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
