Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
