i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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