anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
