I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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