so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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