Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
