Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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