Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
All I want is dick and wine.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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