I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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