We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
