Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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