butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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