I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
