Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize