I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize