loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize