her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Randomize
