You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
