honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
