There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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