Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
