I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Randomize
