is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
