my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
