hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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